After many attempts at using the NG Tube, my parents and I decided that getting a Gastric Tube (or G-Tube) implanted would be my next best shot. I had no idea what it would look like. I assumed that a small hole would be drilled into my stomach and a skin flap would be left to cover the hole when I wasn't using the feeding pump. When I woke up after my surgery, the site was covered with layers of gauze and tape so I had no idea what was going on under there for a day or two. I was kind of afraid to look, but when they took off all the bandages, I was very surprised with what I saw; not because it was bad, but because I had never seen anything like it before. The G-Tube looked like a beach ball plug on the surface. It stuck out about 3/4 of an inch off of my belly and the rest of the tube was under the skin and in though a hole to my stomach. Even though it wasn't the most attractive thing, I was kind of glad it wasn't just a gaping hole in my body that bile could seep out of all the time.
I don't remember much of what happened right before the surgery, I just remember that I was in a lot of discomfort right afterwards. I lay in my crisp hospital bed, propped up on a few pillows to sit up straight. Every time I moved, it felt like an air bubble ripped through my guts. It's kind of hard to describe. It hurt so much just to sit or stand. I never realized that stomach muscles are used to do so many simple things, like turning a door knob or tying shoelaces. When I was on my way home, I tried to relax by laying down in the back seat of my dad's truck, but Massachusetts's highways are not really noted for easy riding. We went over more speed bumps and grooved pavement than I care to remember.
While having a G-Tube did help me put on some weight (or at least stabilize it), it was not without its complications. There were nights when I was especially restless in bed--tossing and turning all the time. Normally this would be okay, but I was attached to a long tube and with every turn it would wrap itself around my body tighter and tighter. Some nights I woke up with the cord wrapped two or three times around my neck. That was always a little scary--like being gently strangled. Sometimes the two tubes would detach from each other and leak sticky, gross smelling formula all over myself and my bedsheets while I slept. It was a very rude awakening, because I would have to figure out what was going on in a drowsy stupor, get up, stop the machine, unplug, take the sheets off the bed, rinse off, get new sheets and start over.
I think the worst was when the tube would unexpectedly come out. The first time it happened, it was because of the above scenario. I was sleeping and the cords became wrapped around me so tight that it pulled the tube right out of my body. It's a very surreal moment to see something that is supposed to be in your body suddenly out of your body, even if it hasn't always been there. The second time it happened was when I was at school. I was sitting at my desk in English class and preparing to switch periods to History. I was gathering up my textbooks on my desk and accidentally let one slip down the front of my torso, and then POP! The downward force of the book caught on the tube and it came right out. At first I was confused. I immediately rushed a hand to stomach to check for the tube, but it was gone. My stomach felt flat, it was foreign not to feel the bump I was used to. Instead I felt the bump at the bottom of my black shirt, almost on my lap. I sat there, slightly panicked, not sure what to do. I think I waited for the bell to ring and then rushed to the bathroom, still holding the tube through my shirt. When I got there, I locked myself in a stall and tried to figure out if I should put it back in myself. After a minute, I decided I had no other choice, because the hole would start to close up after two hours. (That's what the doctors told me last time. Apparently the stomach heals itself pretty quickly.) The tube part of the G-Tube (or the part that goes inside and looks like a short straw) has a small balloon around the bottom that inflates once it's in your belly to keep it from coming out. In this case, the balloon was broken because my stomach acid had eaten away at it over time. Getting the balloon section in was always the hardest part, because it is a little wider than the rest of the tube and the incision it's going into. So I started pushing it in. I pushed and it resisted, over and over. It would go in a little bit and then feel stuck, not budging any further. But I knew I had to get it all the way in before the bell rang again. So I mustered up everything I could and forced it in. My stomach gulped it up. After that, the rest of the tube went in pretty smoothly and I went to class like nothing had happened.
But somehow, even worse than that, was the time it got ripped out by someone's backpack. I still to this day have no idea how this could have physically happened. But I was walking down the hall (switching classes again) and one of my classmates must have turned quickly with her large backpack on and it swatted my stomach. I felt that classic yank sensation that I was by now getting used to and realized that the damn thing was out again. I couldn't figure out where it was. I scrambled looking all over the ground for it to no avail. Then I raised my eyes up and saw it dangling from the girl's netting on her bag. My eyes widened with shock. There she was, walking down the hall casually with my tube hanging off of her, completely unsuspecting. I was so worried that someone would see and ask her what the hell that was. This very bizarre-looking medical accessory she was now donning. I tried to stealthily snatch at it without being seen. I don't think anyone really noticed what I was doing, thank God. After swatting at it, my tube ended up landing on the dirty school linoleum that had been graced by hundreds of less than hygienic sneakers that day. I quickly grasped it from the floor and brought it to the bathroom. All I could really do was rinse it off a little in the sink before putting it in. Not a very sanitary medical procedure, I must say. But I put it back in like I'd done before, though slightly more grossed out this time. At least nobody saw.
I don't remember much of what happened right before the surgery, I just remember that I was in a lot of discomfort right afterwards. I lay in my crisp hospital bed, propped up on a few pillows to sit up straight. Every time I moved, it felt like an air bubble ripped through my guts. It's kind of hard to describe. It hurt so much just to sit or stand. I never realized that stomach muscles are used to do so many simple things, like turning a door knob or tying shoelaces. When I was on my way home, I tried to relax by laying down in the back seat of my dad's truck, but Massachusetts's highways are not really noted for easy riding. We went over more speed bumps and grooved pavement than I care to remember.
While having a G-Tube did help me put on some weight (or at least stabilize it), it was not without its complications. There were nights when I was especially restless in bed--tossing and turning all the time. Normally this would be okay, but I was attached to a long tube and with every turn it would wrap itself around my body tighter and tighter. Some nights I woke up with the cord wrapped two or three times around my neck. That was always a little scary--like being gently strangled. Sometimes the two tubes would detach from each other and leak sticky, gross smelling formula all over myself and my bedsheets while I slept. It was a very rude awakening, because I would have to figure out what was going on in a drowsy stupor, get up, stop the machine, unplug, take the sheets off the bed, rinse off, get new sheets and start over.
I think the worst was when the tube would unexpectedly come out. The first time it happened, it was because of the above scenario. I was sleeping and the cords became wrapped around me so tight that it pulled the tube right out of my body. It's a very surreal moment to see something that is supposed to be in your body suddenly out of your body, even if it hasn't always been there. The second time it happened was when I was at school. I was sitting at my desk in English class and preparing to switch periods to History. I was gathering up my textbooks on my desk and accidentally let one slip down the front of my torso, and then POP! The downward force of the book caught on the tube and it came right out. At first I was confused. I immediately rushed a hand to stomach to check for the tube, but it was gone. My stomach felt flat, it was foreign not to feel the bump I was used to. Instead I felt the bump at the bottom of my black shirt, almost on my lap. I sat there, slightly panicked, not sure what to do. I think I waited for the bell to ring and then rushed to the bathroom, still holding the tube through my shirt. When I got there, I locked myself in a stall and tried to figure out if I should put it back in myself. After a minute, I decided I had no other choice, because the hole would start to close up after two hours. (That's what the doctors told me last time. Apparently the stomach heals itself pretty quickly.) The tube part of the G-Tube (or the part that goes inside and looks like a short straw) has a small balloon around the bottom that inflates once it's in your belly to keep it from coming out. In this case, the balloon was broken because my stomach acid had eaten away at it over time. Getting the balloon section in was always the hardest part, because it is a little wider than the rest of the tube and the incision it's going into. So I started pushing it in. I pushed and it resisted, over and over. It would go in a little bit and then feel stuck, not budging any further. But I knew I had to get it all the way in before the bell rang again. So I mustered up everything I could and forced it in. My stomach gulped it up. After that, the rest of the tube went in pretty smoothly and I went to class like nothing had happened.
But somehow, even worse than that, was the time it got ripped out by someone's backpack. I still to this day have no idea how this could have physically happened. But I was walking down the hall (switching classes again) and one of my classmates must have turned quickly with her large backpack on and it swatted my stomach. I felt that classic yank sensation that I was by now getting used to and realized that the damn thing was out again. I couldn't figure out where it was. I scrambled looking all over the ground for it to no avail. Then I raised my eyes up and saw it dangling from the girl's netting on her bag. My eyes widened with shock. There she was, walking down the hall casually with my tube hanging off of her, completely unsuspecting. I was so worried that someone would see and ask her what the hell that was. This very bizarre-looking medical accessory she was now donning. I tried to stealthily snatch at it without being seen. I don't think anyone really noticed what I was doing, thank God. After swatting at it, my tube ended up landing on the dirty school linoleum that had been graced by hundreds of less than hygienic sneakers that day. I quickly grasped it from the floor and brought it to the bathroom. All I could really do was rinse it off a little in the sink before putting it in. Not a very sanitary medical procedure, I must say. But I put it back in like I'd done before, though slightly more grossed out this time. At least nobody saw.
Disclaimer: the picture used was found on the internet, but it was the same tube I used.
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